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Lee Greenwood. Ouch. Shoulda seen that one coming.

December 4th, 2009 1 comment

It’s been an interesting week.

Last week was Thanksgiving, of course, but gratitude is for chumps so I didn’t really do anything of the sort. Wooga was on vacation and dogsitting so I spent most of that period there. Miraculously, she did not dump me, there weren’t even any near slapping incidents. Stabbing and/or choking motions made behind my back remain unconfirmed.

I totaled up the financial outlays of that week and made a vow to be more financially disciplined this week for the, say, 15th week in a row. Having been unemployed for as long as I have (anniversary is approaching!) I’m undergoing a disconnect from the world of productivity. I do my daily futility (which is now tops 80 URLs (including multiple saved Craig’s List searches)) and after that….

I’m not writing. I’m barely making it to the gym and I’m certainly not making an effort to increase my physical fitness. Switching banks threw my financial tracking all to hell and Operation Break 220 (pounds) hasn’t been officially abandoned, but I’m not doing anything other than grumbling at my scale.

Yet I’m actually in a better headspace than I was as graduation from PCC approached. Concerns are the same, I’m never going to find a job in the field I studied two years for, but the anxiety isn’t there. There are a few differences, I’m living as an adult, I’ve got my coterie of drunkards and I’m dating someone rather than living with mom, having two friends who were frequently busy and, well, the less said about the rest of that the better.

Interesting thing the second, my homie Ron T is now a citizen of the United States. Having nothing else to do when he announced the finalization of this I bolted up and headed down. It was 12/1, and of COURSE I hadn’t bought a new bus pass yet. I discover this about 15 minutes before I was supposed to be there, y’know, when the fucking bus is arriving at the stop after I’ve been playing Risk on my iPhone.

I’m time critical with a close by destination and the weather is moderate. That’s right, bike. Sans helmet. EGADS, man! What’s wrong with you? Me, that is. I was in a hurry. But federal buildings don’t apparently much care for bikes, there were no racks on the sidewalk. So I locked the much abused Larkspur to a street sign and dashed in.

Now, how the fuck does someone in the post 9/11 world not know how to go through a fucking security point? I’ve never actually BEEN through one and it only took me 2 tries (my belt buckle is really metal, it’s Target so I was mildly surprised). Between a few codgers and an idiot who just wasn’t grasping the situation I was afraid I was going to miss it. But all was well and I arrived to sit with my soon to be not foreign friend in a damn waiting room for a while.

The people being naturalized were told where to sit, but the family/friends types were allowed to roam with cameras. There was an Indian dude with two annoying little shits who wouldn’t shut up. He tried, he really did but they were just bad kids. The girl was in what looked like a Disney princess dress. Ah, cultural imperialism, you so funny. The oath, or whatever, was long. It mentioned the draft, which surprised me. I’d always thought, or maybe assumed, it was administered by a judge, but it wasn’t. Just some lady who looked like a random bureaucrat. They played some pretty lame videos that I’m way too jaded to deal with. Lots of Ellis Island photos, some boat people pictures, what look like portraits of people dressed up for the swearing in, all to the strains of America the Beautiful. None of it was as bad as them playing that fucking Lee Greenwood song. Jesus, what’s wrong with people? That was cheesy in the fucking 80’s when it came out. God damned Walmart shoppers, and bureaucrats. No imagination at all.

Then there was a video speech from Obama. All hail.

After that, drinking. Woot.

More weirdness, I left my bike locked to said street sign and ended up going to a Pizza Schmizza bar to watch the Blazers suck somewhat less than they had been. Yeah, you read that correctly. Odd, but cool.

Hold on, there’s more weirdness. (shut up, this is only 755 words so far, 763 now). I ran over my budget for the week by grocery shopping. Really weird, that. The one time I plan on drinking most of my grocery money, I go buy stuff. Jeez, what’s wrong with me.

And in closing for weirdness, I, at 34, just asked my mom if I could borrow her car. Thanks, folks, I’ll be here all week, don’t forget to tip your waitress you’ve been a great crowd.

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