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Archive for the ‘Rant’ Category

On Ghostbusters and disingenuous  feminist operators 

July 16th, 2016 No comments

(Review starts about 30 seconds in)

(I might have to fix that link later, I’m on my iPhone)

“Incredibly medicore, really boring.”

Paul Feig is a talentless hack who seized on a shallow Tumblr feminism to crawl out of director’s jail. His “women can be X, too” ethos isn’t new, it isn’t interesting and as one known example, Melissa McCarthy isn’t doing anything Roseanne Barr didn’t do better twenty years ago.

Feigism doesn’t make women strong, it doesn’t make women interesting. You wanna see a movie about strong women Getting Over on The Man, go see 9 to 5. You want strong genre women? Agent fucking Scully. You want strong real world women? Check out anything on TV with Juliana Margulies (I prefer ER to The Good Wife, courtrooms bore me).

Talented people making good things who don’t need an collegiate ideology department “narrative” to boost the signal.  That’s how you make a point.

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Cheater Bowl XLIX

February 1st, 2015 No comments

None of what follows is an attempt to troll.

Football is an allegory for what made America great. Not the freedom and democracy pap high school tried to feed us, but territorial aggrandizement, free use of organized violence and submission to proper authority. It’s what conquered our land and what protected the West from the Soviets (mostly alone), the Nazis (although we needed help) and the Kaiser (since the Entente Cordiale couldn’t finish the job).

This piece of crap about to begin is unfortunately an allegory for what America has become. Lackeys of the wealthy cheating to add to the gold piles of billionaires. An ignorant citizenry rife with partisans making excuses for their arbitrarily chosen side. Contrarian heckling from the peanut gallery over semantics and minutiae.

It’s gone from Patton and Bradley to Enron and Iran-Contra. Senior executives look the other so they can unconvincingly plead ignorance about the corruption conducted on their behalf.

No matter who wins today, America loses.

I hate my union

April 23rd, 2012 No comments

This should be an “I hate insurance companies” rant, because I have exactly gone around a circle of all the phone numbers on the back of my benefits card. Sorry to my friends who work in insurance, but you’re spreading an evil purer and more insidious than drug dealers. Crack doesn’t pretend it likes you.

But no. This is the fault of my union’s benefits trust. First they farm everything out to different highly specialized cut rate firms. After that they suck on their own. I’ve never gotten anything but cluelessness from that 800 number. Even a simple question like “how much is this going to cost me” befuddled someone’s grandma I just got off the phone with. Actually I got off the phone with an answering machine, since when I made clear the difficulty I was having getting someone to look at a list I KNOW SOMEONE HAS she transferred me to an entirely unrelated department! Shit, Gam-Gam, sorry I took you away from your cross stitching! Why aren’t you in Florida waiting to die?

These “benefits” might suck, but at least they’re costing me $26 per week! Because my rep is also an idiot. And is old, coincidence? Well, maybe.

I always thought that unions were for shitty workers who needed protection from termination for cause. My membership in one has not changed that opinion.

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On the present birth control debate: You’re wrong

February 9th, 2012 No comments

I’m tired of writing this on Facebook over and over so I’m putting up something I can copy/paste or link to.

Requiring Catholic employers to provide birth control access to their employees is absolutely a violation of their religious freedom.

Now, I say fuck ’em. Even if you’re a Biblical literalist (which I am most certainly not) “be fruitful and multiply” was handed down after the Flood (Noah and the Ark for those whose Sunday School was a long time ago or nonexistent). The world has been plenty repopulated. Fundamentalists don’t give God enough credit as far as I’m concerned.

But there’s that stupid Constitution again. It says “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion” which is so hilariously overwritten a phrase that over TWO HUNDRED YEARS later it’s still up for debate. I’m of the camp that says it only means there will be no state church of the US. I’m fairly certain the more popular interpretation is more like churches can do a lot of stuff other entities can’t. Like have special exemptions from laws and regulations that conflict with their religions.

So take someone who thinks
God can’t tell what year it is and convince them that their church should get asterisks in the rule books and you have Catholics and probably a lot of Evangelicals that are really pissed right now. That’s what this is about.

Again, let me make my position on the matter clear: Fuck ’em. I favor birth control and I find their theological underpinnings invalid.

However, to birth control advocates I also say fuck you. Your one-sided moral outrage is just as reprehensible as theirs. A LOT of Americans view moral considerations as at least equal to fiscal or legal considerations. In a democracy their view is just as important and valid (I repeat JUST AS VALID) as yours. You can’t claim to have any superiority if you automatically assume that the whole thing is a cynical Machiavellian ploy to get votes. The likelihood of bad actors in the traditional morals camp is no more than it is in the post-sexual revolution (as good a neutral name as any, right?) camp.

You can hate someone for their beliefs, really I have no problem with that, but if you’re spouting ignorance of what they believe you’re just an asshole. And that’s fine, but take off the cloak of progressive open mindedness when you do it.

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My job, a respirator and POTUS

January 20th, 2012 No comments

I’m at an “occupational health center” o be fitted for a respirator. The privacy notice says that they can release my personal (or protected?) health information in order to protect the President.

No shit. They must have wrote that into HIPAA.

Really, I don’t think that fucking guy, whoever it is at the moment, is that important.

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Jobs my hairy ass

December 19th, 2011 No comments

The only way jobs are created is when businesses hire people.

Witness:

“But Hanauer says the economy is like an ecosystem and that its lifeblood is the spending power of the middle class, not people like him [he’s a venture capitalist – JW]. He says business people spend their time fundamentally on two things: creating sales and cost containment. Or, as he puts it, “how to not create jobs.”

“The fewer jobs you can create, for the revenue you create, the more profit you make,” Hanauer says. “The only time that businesses create jobs is when middle-class consumers essentially put a gun to our heads, in the form of orders for products that we can’t make ourselves, and then we hire people and create jobs.” ‘

Every politician, pundit or shill talking about the government “creating jobs” should have this tattoo’d on their stomachs, upside down so they can read it in the shower.

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Final proof: Self-teaching is bullshit

March 2nd, 2011 No comments

Yesterday in three hours I failed to achieve this.

Today, after my boss told me what tool and technique to use, I did that in a total of 48 minutes, including two trips back to the shop (via the stairs, elevator tech’s here) and talking to the dumb bitch running housekeeping today. Actual drilling time on the second hole, I shit you not: FOURTEEN SECONDS.

This is why I hate my boss.

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Old Town and the problem with Portland cops…

February 10th, 2011 No comments

From the story in the Portland Clackamas Tribune. (link)

Here’s the operative line:

“Five to 6 a.m. is prime time, [officer Daryl] Turner says, because that’s the shift-change hour for police, and crack dealers in Old Town know it. So they know the officer on duty will likely be writing up his or her reports rather than patrolling.”

Who can’t see the solution to this problem? Seriously, PPB, you can’t adjust your shifts by an hour here and there every once in a while to keep homeless drug addicts on their toes?

How about this:

“Tonight, David Bryant is that officer, and he says being alone makes a difference when he’s in Crack Alley. Bryant says if there’s provocation — a fight for instance — he’s out of his car in a moment. But he thinks twice about approaching a large group of dealers without a partner.”

Again, pretty simple solution, two of them I can see here. First, you could go back to putting two cops in a car, or Old Town’s really not that big, maybe some foot patrols. Good ole community policing, get to know the bad guys instead of just one time busting heads to make the shift pass faster.

The problem with Portland cops is that they’re just lazy. Cops want the exclusion zones because it makes their jobs easier. Probable cause? For every arrest? Wow, that’s just too much work, innit? Foot patrols? All that walking? Oh, bah and humbug.

Cop defenders say, “Policing is hard!” “Policing is dangerous!” and I say, “Then they should get another job!” Nobody stumbles into policing. You don’t get a badge waiting for your band to get a record deal. These guys know what they’re getting into, and then they start whining (yes, whining) about how hard it is. How dangerous.

Hell with ’em.

Hell with that.

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A lot of what we seem to be doing is actually getting design out of the way

January 6th, 2011 No comments

The full quote from Jonathan Ive, Senior Vice President of Industrial Design at Apple: “A lot of what we seem to be doing in a product like that [the iPhone] is actually getting design out of the way. And I think when phones develop with that sort of reason and theyre not arbitrary shapes, it feels almost un-designed.” (emphasis added

I never considered this before I started my career in maintenance, but I’m really getting adamant about it. Design is bullshit. Every time I see some article or blog or talking head running off about fucking design I want to strangle them. It’s just so much ego that makes shit hard for people to actually work with. Just make shit that works, make shit that’s easy for people to work with and (especially) work on and get your God damned ego out of the process.

Let’s look at the iPhone. I’ll use my 3GS as an example because it’s sitting right here on the table next to my keyboard. It’s a piece of glass with plastic on the back and a little ring of, I dunno something shiny. Design ended, thank you very much. It wasn’t intended to look cool, it was intended to not poke me in the junk when it’s in my pocket. Which is where any cell phone (any guy’s cell phone, anyway) is most of the time. Good design.

Let’s look at a piece of shit like this:
Stupid fucking sink

I want to hurt so bad whatever asshole thought of sinks like this. The hotel that was my last job had sinks kinda like this in the guest rooms and they were fucking horrible. What is a sink meant to do? Contain water. That’s its job, its entire reason for being. You put water into the sink and it stays in the sink. Does that happen with this sink? Probably not. The sinks at that hotel were less stylized but the same concept. Put a big porcelain bowl on top of the counter so water splashes all over the crotch of anyone who tries to use it. Way to go designer, you fail usability forever. That’s just the user, I’m not even going to get (too far) into what something like this does to the poor bastard responsible for maintaining it. On a sink like this you can see the grout that keeps water from seeping through the counter. Any time you can see grout it’s gonna get ugly. Pink is about the best you can hope for but really black is more likely. Pretty nasty.

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Mr President, find your balls. Please, for the country #obama

November 3rd, 2010 No comments

Two(ish) years ago on this very URL I blogged about Obama’s inauguration and all that hope and change shit he was talking about. He seemed like a good deal, he steamrolled W pt 2 and his insane crone sidekick, he wasn’t vocally anti-gun and he (most importantly for a Democrat) had some mojo, some desire to kick ass. But no, he appears to have the killer instinct of a stale Twinkie.

Barack, what the hell were you thinking with those town hall meetings? That the Republicans would play fair? That bipartisanship is a viable tactic in this era? The Tea Party was revving its engines, Democratic office holders were getting their asses handed to them all over the country and if the White House was doing anything it sure couldn’t be seen from ground level. You can’t fight these people by being a nice guy. You won your election on the internet, why the hell did you take it to where you could get mobbed? Where was the social media wizardry, the YouTube songs, the volunteer phone banks? What happened to Obama for America?

Never mind, you’re busy, I’ll answer this one. He couldn’t keep it. It was an electioneering machine and POTUS isn’t allowed to run one of those from the White House. So he turned it over to the Democratic Party and, yeah, they killed it. I don’t know why he didn’t spin it off to an entirely new non-profit. The DNC couldn’t run a successful nationwide campaign if they were allowed to buy votes with weed and hookers. Where were the attack ads pointing out the Wall Street bailout was Bush’s idea? Where were the shadily funded billboards comparing the Tea Party to the Taliban? Ah, that’s right, liberals are too nice for that shit. Too nice to win elections. But we all know that. They wanted to run Hilary for crying out loud. They didn’t bring the hope, Barack did.

Well, the Tea Party’s here, proving once again in American politics volume trumps thought and Congress is gonna be deadlocked. What are you going to do about it, Barack?

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